Funny Jokes

Teacher: 2 girls are dancing; change this sentence into exclamatory sentence.
Student: Wow!

Pupil: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Off course not.
Pupil: Good, because I didn't do my homework.

Teacher: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
John: Don't bite any.

Teacher: John, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
John: You told me to do it without using tables.

Q: Why did the melon jump into the water?
A: Because it wanted to be a WATERMELON.

My friend is a vegetarian. She said that I'm not a real animal lover because I don't eat meat, and if I really loved animals I would only eat lettuce, vegetables and grains. I said, " If you really loved animals, you'd stop eating their food ".

5 year old to his grandfather,' Are you still growing?'
' Why do you ask child?' inquired his grandpa.
' Well, the top of your head's coming through your hair?

Teacher: Anna, go to the map and find north America.
Anna: Here it is!
Teacher: Correct, now class who discovered America?
Class: Anna

Q: Why was Math book sad?
A: Because it had too many problems.

I have the perfect son
Does he smoke?
No, he doesn't.
Does he drink whiskey?
No, he doesn't.
How old is he?
He is 3 months old.

Mom: My naughty child takes all the money whenever I hide them. What should I do with this kid?
Uncle: Put the money in his books. He will never ever touch the money again.

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!